Some of us have been there. We’re in a relationship that isn’t exactly what we want. But, still, we don’t want to leave because we’re worried about being alone, or we don’t want to hurt the other party. What’s worse, you believe that all of your friends live happy, fulfilling relationships. At the same time, you’re stuck in an unhappy one; it can feel like the weight of the world is on your shoulders.
That said, you’ll be surprised that 64% of American couples in committed, long-lasting relationships said they eventually realized they had to break up, even when they still loved each other. And we know it’s better to understand when to end a relationship that isn’t working rather than stay in it and wonder how to read Snapchat messages without them knowing.
When is it time to end a relationship? It’s never easy to know. After all, relationships require time, effort, and energy—not to mention a certain level of emotional investment. However, there are certain telltale signs that it may be time to break up. Here are some signs that might indicate an unhealthy relationship.
1. You Don’t Communicate Anymore
If you and your partner used to be chatty, and now you barely say two words to each other, that’s one of the signs to end the relationship. Often, couples stop communicating because they think they already know everything about the other person and there’s nothing left to say.
Some other reasons why couples might stop communicating are:
- One person is always talking, and the other feels like they can’t get a word in
- One person is always busy and doesn’t have time to talk
- The couple has grown apart and no longer shares common interests
However, communication is key in any relationship. If you don’t want to talk to your partner, it might be time to end things. You deserve to be with someone with whom you can share your thoughts and feelings. Here are more than 35 signs of he doesn’t want to stay with you anymore.
2. You Fight All the Time
All couples fight from time to time, but if you find that you’re fighting more than you’re getting along, that can be a sign that it’s time for the relationship to end.
Sure, fighting is normal and can even be healthy if it’s done constructively. For example, you can differ in opinions and still respect each other.
But if all you ever do is fight with each other, maybe it’s time to take a step back and re-evaluate things. Is there any reason why you keep arguing? Do we have different values that will end our relationship? Do we communicate with each other?
If you find that you can’t seem to get along no matter what you do, it might be time to move on.
3. You Don’t Have Any Fun Anymore
It’s normal for the honeymoon phase to wear off after a while, but if you’re not having any fun anymore, it might be time to break up. Likewise, if your relationship feels more like a chore than something you enjoy, it’s a sign that things have gone too far.
Of course, all relationships require effort, but if you’re constantly putting in all the work with no payoff, it’s not worth your time. One person can’t be responsible for all the fun in a relationship—if your partner can’t or won’t put in the effort to make things enjoyable, it’s one of the signs to end the relationship.
Likewise, it’s not fair to you if you’re the only one trying to keep things interesting. You should be in a relationship that makes you happy, not one that you have to work so hard at.
It doesn’t mean you’re lazy—it just means that you deserve better. If you wonder what quality time in a healthy relationship means, here are some fun date night ideas you can try out with your partner.
4. You Aren’t Growing Together
If you and your partner are no longer growing together, it may be time to end the relationship. This can mean both personal growth and growth as a couple.
For example, if you want to get married and have kids, but your partner doesn’t, it’s likely that you’re not on the same page and won’t be for the foreseeable future. In this case, it would be better to end things now rather than wait around hoping for a change that may never come.
Other signs to end the relationship include one person wanting to move to a new city while the other hopes to stay put. If you’re not growing together, you’ll likely grow apart, and the relationship will suffer as a result.
5. You Find Yourself Making Excuses for Your Partner
Whether it’s their bad temper or they never put any effort into the relationship, making excuses for someone is never a good sign. Do you wonder how does it look on the outside?
Imagine you’re at a party with your partner, and someone asks how things are going. Do you find yourself quickly making up excuses for why they’re not acting like themselves or why they’re in a bad mood? If so, you’re likely making excuses for them more often than you’d like to admit.
Making excuses is a sign that you’re trying to make the relationship work harder than it should. Unfortunately, it’s also a sign that you’re not being honest with yourself about the reality of the situation.
Suppose you find yourself making excuses for your partner. In that case, it’s time to talk seriously about where the relationship is. Even if two persons have different types of aesthetics and opposite views on life, healthy communication is possible for them.
6. You Don’t Feel Supported by Your Partner
A healthy relationship is built on a foundation of support. If you don’t feel supported by your partner, likely, the relationship is not as strong as it could be. Feeling unsupported can manifest itself in different ways.
For example, you might feel like your partner is not interested in hearing about your day or that they are not there for you when you need them. Maybe you feel like your partner is always putting their own needs ahead of yours. If you don’t feel supported by your partner, it’s important to communicate this to them.
If they are unwilling to listen to your concerns and make changes, it will end our relationship. You can’t push someone to be something they’re not, and if your partner is unwilling to compromise, it might be time to walk away.
7. Your Self-Esteem Has Suffered
If you wonder how to know when to end a relationship, think about yourself first. If you don’t feel good about yourself, it’s hard to feel good about the relationship. Of course, you may believe that your childhood traumas or past relationship failures are to blame for your low self-esteem.
However, it’s important to remember that your present relationship also contributes to how you feel about yourself. If your partner makes you feel bad about yourself, it’s time to end the relationship. How can they take control of your emotions?
Usually, it starts with little things, like making a negative comment about your clothes or how you did something. But over time, these comments can erode your self-esteem and make you see signs of the end of a relationship.
If you find that your self-esteem has suffered since being in the relationship, it’s time to end it. You deserve to be in a relationship where you feel good about yourself, not one that makes you feel bad.
8. They’re Controlling
Suppose your partner tries to control every aspect of your life, from what you wear to who you hang out with. In that case, that’s not healthy or normal behavior in a relationship. In fact, it might indicate a serious problem known as controlling behavior or emotional abuse.
Ending the relationship is probably the best action if your partner exhibits these behaviors. However, you can easily tell someone is controlling you if you feel you have to constantly adjust your behavior to please them or avoid their anger.
This kind of treatment is not only unhealthy, but it can also be one of the crucial signs to end. For example, suppose you’re in a relationship with someone who is physically or emotionally abusive. In that case, ending the relationship is essential for your safety.
9. Your Gut Tells You It’s Time
Sometimes, you just know deep down that a relationship has run its course. However, if you feel that something is off, or you’re constantly worrying about the state of your relationship, then it might be time to call it quits.
Of course, having doubts and fears about relationships is normal. Still, if you’re constantly second-guessing your relationship or obsessing over whether it’s going to work out, then it’s probably not in a good place.
Trust your gut instinct and go with your gut feeling on this one. If you think it might be time to end things, then it probably is. But, intuitively, you most likely know when something just isn’t right.
It is never an easy thing to do. Still, sometimes it’s necessary for both parties involved to move on and find happiness elsewhere. If any of the above nine signs apply to your current relationship, then maybe it’s time to take steps towards ending things. Trust your gut, communicate with your partner, and take things one day at a time.