Questions to Ask Each Other When Planning a Wedding

Weddings are exciting to plan. They also come with tons of different details to pin down, from the venue to the flowers. With so much to figure out, having a conversation about what you both envision for your wedding can be a great place to start. Here are some questions that can help you sort out the broad strokes:

How much do you want to spend?

This is a big one, since the budget you decide on will drive many other decisions. Knowing how much you can spend will help you to set realistic expectations and make smart decisions throughout the planning process.

Is a parent or other relative helping us pay for the wedding?

Some couples are lucky enough to have a relative who’s willing to chip in. If that’s the case, it’s important to establish who will be contributing what when figuring out your total budget. Find out what the relative is comfortable with—maybe they want to contribute a specific amount or just plan to cover the cake or venue.

Is it a destination wedding?

Destination weddings can be a lot of fun. They also add a layer of complexity to the planning process. Before committing, make sure you’re both on board with all the logistics involved in planning a destination wedding—from travel arrangements to guest accommodations.

When do we want to get married?

Setting a date can help you narrow down other decisions from what flowers are in season to what venues are available. Having a date can also make everything feel more real. Talk through when you want to get married—do you want to celebrate during a specific season or tie the knot on an important anniversary?

How many people will we invite?

Putting together a guest list, or just deciding roughly how many people each of you want to invite, can help you settle on other decisions like the size and style of your venue.

What are your must-haves?

Every couple has different priorities for their wedding day. Make sure you’re both on the same page about what’s most important to each of you—whether it’s the venue, food, music, décor, or something else entirely.

Are we financially prepared?

Before committing to any major wedding expenses, make sure that both of you are comfortable with the amount you plan to spend. Discuss how you plan to pay for things. After all, what you spend on your wedding will impact other decisions you make as a married couple. Going for a big wedding might mean waiting longer to save up a down payment on a house. This can also be an opportunity to discuss your joint finances and what you envision for your financial future. Do you plan to combine your finances or keep them separate? Now that you’re about to become financially dependent on each other, is it time to get life insurance for an added layer of financial security? Do you want permanent life insurance policies such as whole life insurance?

Getting on the same page

A wedding signals the beginning of your life together. Taking the time to talk about these questions can help streamline the planning process. As you make plans and visit vendors, communicate clearly and honestly with each other—be realistic about what you can afford and talk through important decisions together.